(The first in a series of myth-busting pieces) In contrast to most advice columns, I think procrastination has less to do with fear, and more to do with hope.

When you procrastinate on doing the 'big rocks' in your life (finding your next career step, starting a business, writing your book, etc.) you do so to preserve hope: As long as you don't 'put yourself out there', then in your mind you can continue to live in the possibility that someday you will live up to your ideal of yourself and earn the respect of people important to you.

You have an inner debate between the 'part' of you that believes in you and the 'part' of you that doesn't think you are 'enough' or have what it takes. You are worried that if your efforts to take a bold next step don't go well you will interpret it as a confirmation that you will never be able to live up to the dream you have for yourself (or at least not without an insurmountable amount of effort). The "not enough" part will have won for good. That would lead to hopelessness.

Your procrastination behaviors are an effort to prevent the bursting of that bubble. By not testing your capability in the real world, you can hold onto the hope you are still capable of achieving dreams you've long had for yourself. You can hold onto the hope that the good impression you have made on people to date will endure because you won't expose what's really (not) inside.

Procrastination serves the psychological purpose of allowing you to have hope that you will prove and redeem yourself in the future, so that you can accept your "not good enough" self and keep going for now.

The problem is that when you don't put yourself out there, you also don't grow from experiences. You don't move your life forward.

Take Away: People who procrastinate seek relief. They get rewards by living in hope. Successful people seek real results. They get rewards by contributing what they love and learning from their mistakes.

P.S. I've started my next step --I'll be done writing my book by the end of summer. Are you starting yours?

Click here for tips on what to do instead.

If you are in the NY metro area, you and your friends can attend Sharon's free workshop on August 13th. Go to www.sharonmelnick.com/workshopregistration.htm for details.

Dr. Melnick answers YOUR questions about getting out of your own way. (Click here to ask Sharon your most burning question.)